Frum Jokes

Golfing on Shabbos!

Q: What is the halacha regarding someone who is playing golf on Shabbos (where there is an eruv) and whilst he is on the green hitting his ball towards the hole, he accidentally pulls up a blade of grass? 

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Two astronauts land on Mars...

Two astronauts land on Mars.
Their mission: to check whether there is oxygen on the planet.

"Give me the box of matches," says one. "Either it burns and there is oxygen, or nothing happens."

He takes the box, and is ready to strike a match when, out of the blue, a…

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Why were the telephone bills in Shushan so high? Because they were all "Persian to Persian."

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mishpatim and adar

Why is Parshas Mishpatim (where the slave can choose to stay with his master and get his ear nailed at the doorpost)always around the month of Adar? Mi shenichnas our door.... (apologise to all!)

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classic Rogatchover זצ"ל humour

The Rogatchover, Rav Yosef Rosen was famed for his genius and known also for his wit. He was once in his study with a close friend and famous Rabbi in his own right when a woman entered and asked The Rogatchover to bentch (bless) her. As he often replied to…

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Two Yeshiva bochurim come to a locked private tennis court. After looking over the situation, they climb over the fence and start playing. The owner of the the tennis court notices them there and runs out. The owner screams at them can't you guys read, the sign says "Closed no…

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